The Band Wagon

Growing

2008-06-07T18:09:00.004-04:00

Well, it's officially been a while since I posted. I'm not sure a whole lot of people actually read this anyway, but it seems like I should update. School's out for the summer. I am trying to rest and relax and figure out what steps I want to take next. I will still be teaching next year, but I really want to get my master's degree. Someday I will,,but I can't decide from where and in what. I am trusting in the Lord to direct me (at least I'm trying).
Oh, and I'm having fun being "childish." In fact I'm off to play video games with some friends. Rock on, Rock Band!

Warning: Contents may be considered blasphemous.

2007-12-17T11:09:00.000-05:00

Recently a friend relayed a very human twist to a Christmas program and it got me thinking. I realized that very often we deify every aspect of the nativity story, seeming to forget that the only thing truly holy was the child, the baby. So, I started studying Luke 2 and Matthew 11 and thinking about what might be there between the lines. Now, realizing that God’s hand is in everything I know that things happened just as they should, but that is the case for all of our lives isn’t it, and we rarely handle our situations with the aplomb and grace that seem to permeate the nativity story. Now, fair warning, I am not trying to be crass, just a little realistic, I may offend somebody, but you have been warned. There are so many aspects of the birth of Jesus that could be retold, but I chose to focus on the shepherds, it seems to me that it probably wasn’t as calm as the Bible depicts.
Luke 2:9 says of the shepherds “An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord showed around them, and they were terrified.” Hmm, that seems pretty tame to me. Remember, later in Luke it says that the shepherds went and told others about all they had seen; this seems a little more realistic:
“You are never going to believe what happened to me and Jedediah last night. I am telling you it was the freakiest thing ever. So we’re watching our sheep, mindin’ our own when suddenly out of nowhere this guy shows up, and he’s glowing, I mean like someone stuck a lamp up his tunic, really glowing. So Jedediah leans over to me and says, ‘Hey man, you seein’ what I’m seein.’ I couldn’t say anything, I just nodded. Then this glowing guy starts talking. He tells us not to be afraid. Right, like a glowing guy appearing out of nowhere is a common occurrence, all I could think was, where’s my staff. Then he tells us that he brings us good news of great joy for all people. He says that a baby is born in Bethlehem and he is Christ the Savior. Man, I’m glad my parents made me go to Torah classes as a child or I would have never known what he was talking about. I was pretty convinced at that point that this guy was a few fish short of a catch, but then all of the sudden this whole group of these glowing guys shows up, and they start singing. Right there in the field, they're singing and swaying and making a big deal out of everything. It really scared the sheep, not to mention Jed and me. And then, just like that (snap), they’re gone. I look over at Jed and his eyes are totally bugging out of his head. But by now I’m a bit curious, so I say to Jed, “Let’s go check it out.” Jed agrees, but first we had to go get a change of clothes, those glowing guys scared Jed so much he soiled himself. So we head back to Jed’s house and then set out for Bethlehem. It wasn’t too bad of a walk, but the whole way I kept thinking, what the h___ are we going to find when we get there, this better not be some trick. But sure enough, we get to Bethlehem and we find the baby, right where the angel told us. (I found out later that’s what you are supposed to call those guys.) So anyway, we get there and there is this girl and a guy camping out in a barn, they must have been really poor, I mean, yeah the town was busy, but surely someone could have shown a little compassion at the sight of a few coins. Nope, there they are in this cattle stall, and there is the cutest baby you’ve ever seen, sleeping away in feeding trough. I’m convinced he is what those angels said. If you don’t believe me, go check it out. Jed and I just got back this morning. We’ve been telling everyone we know. Now, about that drink…”

2007-12-04T08:06:00.000-05:00

So, I was reminded that it has been about six months since I have posted on my blog. I suppose that it is high time I updated this thing.
First, let me remind anyone who reads this that my life is pretty boring, but I suppose no one thinks their life is spectacular. I am teaching fourth grade at a small private school, which has its perks, but also has its drawbacks. One of the perks is some of the ridiculous things that come out of the mouths of these nine- and ten-year olds. For example, one of my students was out sick for a few days. When they returned to class they politely informed me that they may ask to go to the bathroom frequently because they had been sick with "the diarrhea" and may still have a little. How do you not laugh at a student like that. My students also know that I used to live in Germany, but can't figure out that I wasn't born there (in fact, I was born about three miles from where the school is). They have asked me, repeatedly, how I speak English so well if I am a German. (My Jewish grandmother gets a kick out of that!)
Hmm, so life outside of work is great. I spend most of my time reading, because, yes, I am a nerd like that. I also am involved in small group, bible study, Thursday night "book" club (substitute "favorite alcoholic beverage" for "book"), and Starbucks coffee night (where only a few of us actually drink the coffee), oh yeah, and "cigar club" where I don't smoke but just hang out.
I think I am finally realizing that there are quite a few people in L-land worth knowing. When I stop and think about it life may be boring, but I really do enjoy it.

Preparing

2007-07-31T16:44:00.000-04:00

I realized lately that I have spent more time preparing to teach next year than I have studying God's word. I came to this realization when I was, somewhat simultaneously, asked about a scripture reference and a history date. I couldn't recall the reference, the date was easy. I don't really expect myself to be a walking Bible concordance, but I would like to think that I was familiar enough with scripture to at least get the right book, even the right testament. The history fact, on the other hand, I could give with no hesitation and even add in a little tidbit of little known information, mostly to show off.
I wonder if I have become someone who squeezes God in when I have time. I know I can talk pretty well, but I realized that this summer, when I have nothing but time, I have rarely made an effort to communicate with God. What will happen when I don't have the time?
It seems a little ridiculous to be admitting this to a group of friends and strangers. Maybe this is my way of assuaging a little guilt. Maybe, just maybe, someone else feels the same way I do - that they aren't really making the effort. Don't join this club. Do something about it - that's what I plan to do. Happy reading to you, may you be convicted where conviction is needed!

2007-06-14T00:09:00.000-04:00

Quotes of a week spent with my family:
"Ah, pink lemonade, not only is it tasty, but it's oh so cute." - little sister
"I'm the good guy and you're the bad guy." "Why can't I be the good guy?" "Because, you're not a guy." - conversation with my six-year-old cousin
"You can't dive into the pool." "Yes I can." "No you can't." "Yes I can, I know how to dive." "Well, you're not allowed to dive into the pool." "Why?" "You'll break your neck." "That's okay, it's already broked." - more conversations with a six-year-old

Tragedy

2007-04-17T07:26:00.000-04:00

In the past week it seems that tragedy has hit my friends with a sledge hammer. First, some friends from Germany lost their infant daughter to heart problems. Now Becs, and others that I know from Blacksburg, face the shock of a huge tragedy.
It's all enough to make a person's brain (and heart) hurt. I know that in both situations the question that will arise is "Where was God in all of this?" Our tendency, when we want to make God like us, is to say that God could not have ordained these things to happen. The truth is that God is completely sovereign, not only over the great moments in our lives but over the terrible ones as well. Do I completely understand this - not hardly. Do I completely accept this - I'm working on it. Do I completely believe this - absolutely.
It's easy to focus on the tragedy and get lost in the grief of the situation. In both cases I have already heard God praised for what he has done. Nothing is done with out purpose, nothing is done in vain, and ultimately all things, even tragedy, work to the glory of God. (Hallelujah!) Now, can I say with Job, "Though he slay me, yet will I trust him."? I know several people who can, and I pray, with confidence, that when it is my time in life to face that situation, I will be able to say with resiliency "I trust in the name of the Lord my God" - Psalm 20:7

2007-04-06T10:49:00.000-04:00

Well, I'm officially moved in. I was going to take some photos and upload them to all my blogs, but I am still waiting on a bookshelf to arrive and right now my apartment isn't quite complete. But, it's home. It's quiet, and I love it.
A friend of mine gave me a plant as a housewarming gift. He needs a name. I'll take a picture of him as well so you out there in blogger land can help with suggestions.
Bye for now!

Movin' on Up!

2007-03-15T06:16:00.000-04:00

So, my "digs" at my parents house are now temporary. I have found an apartment to rent and will be moving the first weekend in April. To say the least, I am ready to be leaving this house and to be living on my own. The apartment is tiny, but it will be mine, all mine!

Little Things

2007-03-05T21:39:00.000-05:00

I'm not trying to be Pollyanna, but since lately I've felt like I have had a lot of crappy days in a row I am trying to find something great about every day. Today, the great thing is that Publix (local supermarket) has started stocking Rooibos teas. I love red tea! Yeah for tea!

Back to School

2007-01-14T00:27:00.000-05:00

I love the week report cards go out. Know why? It's because my students are so terrified that they are going to get bad grades that they try to compensate for it by being extremely well-behaved- as if their behavior will change the fact that they knew nothing about William the Conqueror, whom we studied for two weeks (even reinacting the Battle of Hastings as a class). The only drawback is the phone calls from parents and the parent-teacher conferences to follow.
"What do you mean by the S (satisfactory) that my child received for obedience?" - Well, that seems a bit obvious; he doesn't obey.
"You don't understand, my child is really quite intelligent, you are just too hard." - Really, well the other 15 student's don't seem to have a problem with basic addition.
Okay, the comments in quotes are true, the responses are what I wish I could have said, but am wise enough not to have.
Hope everyone who gets MLKjr. Day off has a wonderful three day weekend!

It would be funny if it happened to someone else!

2006-12-21T20:56:00.000-05:00

It's official, as of this past Monday I am a true blue teacher. No, I didn't get my teaching certificate. No I didn't take some special course. I am officially a teacher because one of my students, who shall remain nameless in case his parents ever google me, threw up on me.
Yes, throw up - on my pants. The entire school got to see his breakfast since he decided to lose it during Chapel.
I really did feel bad for the boy, but I also was so grossed out. Fortunately for all of us my stomach was empty, so that when I started gagging in response nothing came out. I took care of my student, another teacher took my class back to the classroom, and then I calmly went to the bathroom and did the best I could to get the remains of his breakfast off of my pants. All day I kept thinking "there's dried vomit on my pants, this is so gross, I just want to go home."
Needless to say, the minute I got home those pants went in the wash, and went through twice!

It's Christmas Time in the City

2006-12-18T19:15:00.000-05:00

There is a Christmas song out there that has the refrain "We'll have a hot Christmas, boy it's gonna burn you up!" Yes, the lyricist was from Florida, yes he knew what he was talking about, yes I wish it was cold.
I'll I want for Christmas is that it actually feels like Christmas!

Long time

2006-11-29T06:11:00.000-05:00

Wow, I can't believe how much time has passed since I last blogged. I feel like most days I am barely keeping my head above water, but I love it - every single life threatening moment!
Thanksgiving was wonderful, and my kids have been so great this week. Ah, Bliss! I'm looking forward to Christmas, and my favorite part: baking!
Happy next to last day of November!

AL and Lyd, Heather M. just sent me this picture, but I think it's to large a file to email so just feast your eyes here!

Random

2006-10-17T16:58:00.000-04:00

Happy World Menopause Day! (wednesday)

New Friends

2006-10-15T22:47:00.000-04:00

I've just started going to this great "college and career" (aka singles) group at one of the local pres. churches here in Lakeland. It's nice to finally be around a group of peers again, it's been too long. I enjoy the things I'm involved in at my own church and I love the people there, but they are all so much older (or younger) or more married than I am. It's nice to have a niche again. So, to all of you out there, I say find your niche. Don't give up on your opportunities to serve, but make fellowship with people of the same walk and time of life a priority. Kapish!

Wee Sing

2006-10-06T06:21:00.000-04:00

Did any of you ever listen to the Wee Sing series of tapes as a child? No, well, in a stressful moment yesterday I decided to break out the Wee Sing Silly Songs and relive my childhood. I am sure that the people around me thought I was nuts, especially since I was singing about nuts. And, since there are always times when we need spontaneous randomness I'm going to be silly on my blog:

I'm an acorn short and round,

Lying on the cold, cold ground.

Everybody steps on me.

That is why I'm cracked you see.

I'm a nut (clap, clap)

I'm a nut, I'm a nut, I'm a nut (clap, clap).

A peanut sat on a railroad track

His heart was all a'flutter

'Round the bend came number ten

Toot, Toot, peanut butter.

Hey, I never claimed to be sane. Sanity is overrated.

Reminders

2006-09-18T20:17:00.000-04:00

A few weeks ago I reminded a friend of this verse when they had forgotten, and today they reminded me when I had forgotten. So, I thought I would share it with everyone. It is a good reminder no matter what circumstances we're in and how bad we think we've got it.

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away,

yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.

For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us

an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen.

For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

Amen and Amen!

Ponderance

2006-09-07T23:07:00.000-04:00

How does one overcome self-righteousness? I know the answer is by the grace of God, but what exactly does that look like. I feel like this problem is so cyclical, the minute I think I've got that sucker beat, there it is again.
Bleh

Nostalgia

2006-09-06T21:09:00.000-04:00

Attention all teachers, school has been cancelled for Wednesday August 30, 2006 due to Hurricane Ernesto's eminent landfall.

2006-08-29T19:34:00.000-04:00

There's a Hurricane a'comin', Everybody take cover!
Yeah right. The last time I lived in Florida and we got a hurricane day it was the prettiest day of the whole month. So, I don't have to teach tomorrow. I plan to work on lesson plans and do this!

Escaping

2006-08-27T19:30:00.000-04:00

My entire family decided to escape reality and go to the beach this weekend. So, as soon as I was able on Friday afternoon I tore out of the school parking lot, rushed home and threw my stuff in the back of my mom's car and we headed out.
When we got to the beach it was a beautiful late summer evening. The sun was just starting to sink toward the water (we went to the gulf, of course), the wind was blowing through the sea oats and on the breeze was the faint smell of dead fish. Yep, dead fish. We got down there and realized that the red tide that had been in the lower part of the state had moved north and was gracing our quaint little beachy village with its presence.
My mom and I decided that the smell wasn't really that bad, and we were determined to work on our tans this weekend. So we trekked the 50 ft. from our back door to the beach and then hopped across about 50 more feet of hot sand toward the water, only to realize that it was actually far worse than we first thought. Not only did it smell like dead fish, the shore line was covered, literally, with thousands of fish and hundreds of seagulls feasting to their heart's content.
The water was black, rather than the normal blue/green color, like in the picture at the top that I took a few years ago, and it wasn't long before my mother and I were both coughing (which is a side effect of the red tide, not the smell from the fish).
So my family stayed inside the whole weekend, playing games and not killing each other (surprisingly). We also went to Tampa to see the Bodies exhibit at MOSI. Overall a great weekend, but my tan still needs work. And, I was looking forward to a long river-filled Labor Day weekend, but since Ernesto seems to be heading this way I guess that's not likely to happen either. Oh well! The tan will have to wait.

Back In School

2006-08-20T08:42:00.000-04:00

Well, the first week of teaching has come and gone. It's been interesting really. I am enjoying myself immensely, but it is taking every waking moment for me to keep my head above water to prepare for the next day. Everyone keeps telling me just to think of my first year as a black hole, to struggle through it and the following years will be better. It makes me wonder: If I like it, does it mean I'm not doing it right? If I don't mind all the extra work does that say something about me? (Yes, I know, I'm a nerd.)
My class is interesting too. I have 16 students - 9 girls, 7 boys. 3 of my students have been diagnosed with ADD, only one of them is on medication for it. One of the boys in the class is only about 3 inches shorter than me, and he's a 4th grader. 2 of my students are a year older than the average 4th grader, 2 are a year younger. So, my age range is 8 almost 9 to 11. Fun huh! They are a pretty great group of kids, but everyone keeps ranting and raving about how tightly knit they are to each other and I just don't see it. There are definitely little groups within the class and they are definitely mean to one another.
Well, I have about 2 hours before I leave for church. I'm going to go read my history curriculum. Hasta!

I survived!

2006-08-16T22:03:00.000-04:00

Well, I haven't officially finished my first week, but I did survive my first day and it was great. I do have a song that everyone should learn, it's more of a cheer, like a good old fashioned football fight song:

We're Barbarians, Barbarians are we

We conquered Rome in 476 AD Rah-Rah-Rah

They turned their backs

We looted and sacked

We are Barbarians Rah-Rah

B-A-R B-A-R I-A-N-S

We're Barbarians, we're the best, Yeah!

Now, there are more verses about the Visigoths and the Vandals and Saxons, but I'll spare you the torture. If you aren't picturing how this is sung, you can call me and I'll sing it for you! Off key of course!

We Have Lift Off!

2006-08-11T06:42:00.000-04:00

Well, I know its been a while, but the last two weeks have been insane. I've spent most of my waking hours either at school trying to get my room ready and sitting in seminars, or at home reading curriculum and trying to figure out what to teach come Monday morning. Today, in four hours I will have orientation. I'm not nervous yet, but I'm sure I will be come 10:15. Actually, I am so stressed out that my hair is starting to fall out. I know, I know, not healthy, but what am I supposed to do about it?
For those of you who know me well you will be surprised (okay, maybe surprised is an understatement) to know that I have been getting up at 5:45 for the past two weeks and I haven't bitten anyone's head off yet! We'll see how long that lasts!
Adios!

Reunion

2006-07-25T21:27:00.000-04:00

This is my family, well most of us. My sister Callie is missing, and a few cousins and an Aunt, but that's about it. My Grandfather's family has been doing this for 25 years, hence the matching shirts (which my bro designed).

Let the Count Down Begin

2006-07-24T17:13:00.000-04:00

Well, my personal marker that the summer is nearly over was the Boutwell Family's annual reunion. Since it happened this past weekend I suppose I should face the inevitable, put my nose to the grindstone and finish those stinkin' lesson plans. If only I knew how! Transitioning to teaching has been interesting (not that I am actually teaching yet). I'm trying to adjust my sleeping schedule to going to bed earlier and getting up earlier, but it isn't working. My mind keeps telling me that all the good stuff happens after 11:00pm.
The good news is: I no longer work at the Pharmacy. (Think Hallelujah Chorus!) In fact, knock on wood, I may never have to work there again!
Today and tomorrow, I am sucumbing to vanity and working on my tan, then I suppose I'll buckle down and work on those darn plans.
I'm off, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY LYDIA! (by the way).

Chivalry

2006-06-17T21:59:00.000-04:00

Interestingly, in the reading I have been doing to try and bring myself up to speed on the philosophies that are out there concerning teaching I ran across this thought provoking excerpt in the book Ideas Have Consequences by Richard Weaver. He is talking about the role of women in today's society (well, today being the 1960s) and he blames the current women's "lib" situation on men.
"Today, in addition to lost generations , we have a self-pitying, lost sex...putting [woman] on a level with the male is more truly a degradation than an elevation. Perhaps it was the decay of chivalry in men that proved too much. After the gentlemen went, the lady had to go too. Women of the world's ancient regime...knew where the power lies. They knew it lies in loyalty to what they are and not in imitativeness, exhibitionism and cheap bids for attention."

I am sure that anyone could read what I just quoted and decide that I am all for Suzie Homemaker and am "backwards." But, really, what I wanted to consider was that the decline of chivalry is what spurred on the women's movement. So, in some ways, I am saying to the men I know who think feminists are all whack jobs, that they hold some responsibility, as a gender, as well.
I promise in the elipses I am not cutting out anything important, Mr. Weaver is just a tad long winded. I just thought it was an interesting thing for him to say. And I think he is respecting women as he says it.
Comments? Insight? Arguments? I'll take them all.

Teaching 101

2006-06-05T20:16:00.000-04:00

When I first moved to Germany I wished that I had taken German in college. Today, I'm wishing that I had taken at least one education class while at Covenant. While I was at school the other day signing my contract I was given a list of recommended reading to better understand teaching at a classical school. (Don't ask me what a classical school is, at least not yet.) Anyway, I was given a rather long list, and I went on Amazon and found all the books used. Why buy them? Because the language is so thick that I have to write in the margins to understand what I'm reading. I feel like I'm in college all over again, and honestly, after two years of being out of the routine, I'm not sure I'm doing so well jumping back in. Not to mention that my dorm room didn't have internet access or a television. Have I ever mentioned that I am easily distracted? My desk faced the wall (instead of the window) for a reason.
Right now, while posting, I'm also apartment hunting. Sadly, being a teacher is a significant increase in pay. Teachers don't make much money, which tells you what a pittance I receive from my current place of employment. So, with the increase in pay I should be able to afford an apartment. I'm not sure who's more excited, me or my parents (who keep offering to help me move.) So, I get to move out. Any chance anyone wants to move to Lakeland? I'm looking for a roommate!

2006-06-05T19:52:00.000-04:00

So, this is my family. Not the greatest picture in the world, but the photographer didn't know what he was doing. Hopefully my brother will email me a better pic soon!

Update

2006-05-28T13:19:00.000-04:00

For those of you who haven't heard. I got the job, I'm going to be teaching 4th grade! Woo Hoo!

A Few Things

2006-05-22T07:39:00.000-04:00

First, I'm in Germany and right now, if I had a choice, I would never leave. I forgot how much I love it here (Emily J. can I get an Amen!). It has been a wonderful week spent catching up with old friends and making some new ones. I spent a day at the soccer tournament, a day with the Dredges, an afternoon with Renee and a weekend at Blauen. I just need to catch up with a few more people and I suppose it'll happen today or tomorrow.
Only drawback...I'm going to have to spend the night in the Frankfurt airport tomorrow night because my plane leaves so early...bleck.

Second, I have a job interview on Friday, two days after I return. Details to follow, but please pray that it goes well and I get this job, I really, really want it.

Third, my cousin is getting married on Friday. I'm tired of weddings...'nuf sed.

You might live in Podunkville if...

2006-05-05T23:58:00.000-04:00

1. You walk into work and say "Feliz Cinco De Mayo" and your co-worker asks you if that's a traditional German greeting.

2. The happenin' place to be on a Friday night is the bowling alley.

3. "That place down the road sells good gizzards" is a common phrase come lunchtime.

4. "Ain't never" is required when conveying the negative, otherwise people think you're joking.

5. 10 out of 12 people you see on a regular basis (co-workers, friends, etc.) have never been out of the county in which you live. (No, I didn't forget the "r".)

And finally...
6. A customer comes in and asks for "them there what'sadosits, fer yer head" and you know exactly what he's talking about because 20 minutes earlier you helped another customer with a similar request.

Did you ever think...

2006-05-03T21:57:00.000-04:00

that there are words in the dictionary that have probably only been used by one person, ever.

I had to look up a word for my sister, I was helping her with a project, and because I am a nerd I started looking at different words in the dictionary. I must confess, I love dictionaries. I love knowing what words mean, even if I will never use them in my life, it's still fun to know them. So, here's a few words I've decided to put on my vocab list: naugahyde (which was actually already in my vocabulary), basophobia, didymous, and finally variorum. Want to know what they mean, look it up!

For those who have asked, I leave for Germany on Mother's Day, I'm going back to BFA and I'll only be there for 10 days, I have to come back for my cousin's wedding. Of course, if anyone is willing to lose enough weight to meet the 70 lb. weight limit on suitcases, I'll stuff you in my baggage and take you along!

A Better Picture

2006-04-30T23:05:00.000-04:00

Okay, so this is a better picture. That's my cousin Mal and we're at soccer practice. Either she's really glad to see me or she thought that if she hugged the coach she wouldn't have to do sprints! Oh, and the smile's a little goofy, I realize, but I'm pretty sure she just pinched me on my backside!

2006-04-24T20:42:00.000-04:00

One Thing

2006-04-19T23:08:00.000-04:00

I must admit, most times if you asked I would say that I would rather not live in The South, particularly Florida. But, tonight, as I was driving home from church I came across one "southern" thing that makes me glad I'm here.
It might sound a bit odd, but I love Magnolia trees. About two blocks away from my house is this old, old southern home with a huge Magnolia tree in the front yard. The tree is well over three stories tall (however many feet that makes it) and is full of beautiful white blossoms from top to bottom. If you've never seen a Magnolia you've missed out (I might have to go take a picture and rectify that situation). The leaves are a very dark shade of green on top and the underside is almost sage. And the blossoms, well, they are beautiful, ivory and huge. They don't last long (only a couple of hours) once you cut them, but they smell so great. It's one of the things I love about summers in Florida...Magnolia blooms.
If you've ever seen the movie Steel Magnolias you might wonder at the title. Let me explain, a Magnolia tree is beautiful and graceful, and yet it is unpenetrable; nothing, not even grass, grows under a magnolia tree because it's leaves are so dense. The idea behind the movie is that Southern women, like Magnolia trees, are beautiful and graceful, but completely unassailable. I'm not so sure I agree with the analogy, but I still like the movie.
So, there it is, my one southern thing I love.

2006-03-29T08:27:00.000-05:00

This is Tyler. He and I have a dinner date every Wednesday night. It's full of stimulating conversation, mostly about playgrounds, being four, and how many pieces of pizza he'd have to eat if he ate his age. When he asked me what would happen if I had to "eat as many pizza's as you am" I told him I'd explode, which he said was "awesome" (it's his new word) and told me he'd like to see that.

Prague

2006-03-22T00:25:00.000-05:00

I want to be here, enjoying the scenery and remembering the last time I was in this place (minus Anna Lauren's infamous cinnamon rolls...ask Lydia).

Life's little surprises!

2006-03-20T22:22:00.000-05:00

So, have I mentioned yet that I have a new job. It's as a free lance proofreader for a "talent" agency out of Orlando. Have I also mentioned that I hate it. Yes, that's right I don't like it. It's kind of funny actually. For my entire life (well, at least since I was a junior in high school) I have wanted to work for a publishing company and edit books. And, while I like to read, I have found that I don't really like this whole proofreading thing.
Here's why: It's a non-relational job. I sit in a corner with my back to the world and I don't interrupt and I have to get pages and pages done before I can leave and I don't know the people I work with. You know what...it makes pharmacy work seem fun. YES, I did just type that, it wasn't an accident.
In the past couple of weeks I've wondered if sometimes God sits there and thinks, "You idiot, this isn't really what I have for you, but since you're so stubborn go ahead and try it. I'm telling you, you're not gonna like it. I've tried to show you the way I have for you but you are being bull-headed (again). So here, go ahead and try to have your cake and eat it too."
Now, I realize that God and I don't think alike, and that God is more kind and compassionate than I am. But, I still wonder. Anyone else know what I mean?

Ramblings

2006-02-15T22:17:00.000-05:00

Have you ever wondered what people think about as they're falling asleep. This is what I was thinking about last night (besides the fact that I was thinking about what I was thinking about).
I love irony, (I'm an English major, my life is full of irony). What I like best about irony is the various ways it pops up in everyday life. Here's one ironic thing in my life: I've worked my rear off to get a good education, so that I can get a decent job, that pays well, that I like. And, I'm sort of stuck in a job that I don't care for. The ironic thing: my cousin never graduated from highschool, slacks off and shows up late to every job she's ever had, and is currently holding a great job with great benefits and great hours. That's irony! Another irony: I have two very carnivorous parents. They love meat, especially red meat. AND, they were given five biological children - four girls who dislike red meat (to varying degrees) and one son who doesn't eat meat at all. My mom decided that God had a sense of humor, since we can never agree on what to have for dinner.
So, I was thinking about irony as I fell asleep last night, what were you thinking about?

What the?

2006-02-05T22:03:00.000-05:00

My condolences to my friends who are Seahawk fans...you lost to the referees, not the Steelers. Get 'em next year!

Do the "Reformed" truly understand Grace?

2006-02-01T20:30:00.000-05:00

I've been struggling a lot lately with some personal issues. Things I feel I never quite "conquer." And then, tonight I was sitting on my cousin's front porch as she blew smoke into my face and she told me she was finally going to quit smoking, a habit she has been going to quit for 10 years now. My cousin has lived a life that, quite frankly, I would be ashamed of. And yet, while she will admit that she was wrong, shame never seems to enter the picture. That's what caused me to wonder if we truly understand Grace. Most of my friends from high school and college who have some past indiscretion they are struggling to overcome seem to be in the same place as my cousin. Admittedly, there are things in my life where I feel I am in that place too. There is no shame for what I have done. My cousin is always telling me how God's grace is so important. How she is glad that we have a gracious God who forgives all our sin. But, she is continuously falling back into the same sin, over and over. This is a hard thing, because while I think that we will always struggle with sin, and often we will continuously struggle with the same sin, I think the general idea is that we overcome it. Not that we aren't tempted by it, but that we remember the past and we resist temptation - through God's grace. This is where I think shame actually becomes important. If I feel no shame over a past sin, then what is going to motivate me to remember God's grace and resist temptation the next time? Since we live in a society, especially among believers, where the maxim "It's better to ask forgiveness than permission" runs rampant, we simply decide that we can go on continuing to fail because God is gracious and he forgives us. You know the verses in Romans where Paul says, "Should I keep on sinning? By no means." In my mind that has always meant that I'm not going to go out and do something ridiculously, irrationally sinful just because God will forgive me. But I think I'm deciding that it is more appropriately directed at the idea that I do not continue to commit the same sin, but that since I have been forgiven I resist temptation through God's grace.
Now, I'm done with the soapbox. Honestly I needed to get some thoughts down and, since they are all a muddle, I could use some help making sense of them.

Dali and Irritating People

2005-12-29T19:19:00.000-05:00

Yesterday my sister and I went to the Salvador Dali museum. My sister is really into art and has several books on Dali so for her birthday we headed there. I had been when I was in highschool, but it was so much better after studying art in college. (I still think the Louvre is better though!) So, that's the Dali part. Now, on to the irritating people. As everyone knows I have a HUGE tolerance for ignorant people (stop laughing, it isn't that funny). Anyway, my sister and I are sitting there studying a painting when this woman comes up and starts telling her daughter all about "blank space" and Dali's use of "blank space." As we're leaving, once we were out in the parking lot, my sister yells, "It's called negative space you moron!" Just so that you know its a genetic thing.
Anyway, if you're ever in St. PEtersburg, Florida I suggest you stop by the museum. Its a good thing to do when you're tired of the beach and having sand in the bottom of your bathing suit.
Happy New Year everbody!

In response to Lyd

2005-12-11T22:39:00.000-05:00

Regarding Lifestyle Evangelism: (for the beginning of the discussion click on "Lyd's Blog")
Why is it that when we think of lifestyle evangelism we think that joy is going to be the distinguishing characteristic that sets us apart? I'm not sure that Joy is the fruit of the Spirit that will do that. Not because it isn't important, but because in our society joy and hapiness have become the same thing - and lots of people find happiness, albeit temporarily, in things, possessions, etc.
Truthfully, I think there are two characteristics that are more "distinguishing" than Joy - love and faithfulness.
In my Sunday School class we have been talking about sanctification. One of the things we discussed recently is love. My pastor, who has been teaching this class to 30+ women (bless him), quoted something Dietrich Bonhoeffer said/wrote: "Spiritual love will speak to Christ about a brother rather than a brother about Christ." I like that quote, I like the idea that it isn't all about evangelism (although that is part of it). It's also about prayer. We live our lives loving our brother, not only by our public lifestyle, but also by the things they will never see as well.
Now about faithfulness. I think that if our non-believing friends and co-workers, and family see us trying to be faithful, to what we know to be true, it will be an indicator to them of what we have. Now, I don't think this means we don't have bad days and shortcomings, but it's like Mrs. H. said, "it's what we dow with them." As we fail, do we give in to failure, or do we strive to repent, seek God's help and work to be faithful.
It's all part of the whole sanctification thing. Because we are saved by grace through Christ's work on the cross we are set free by the Holy Spirit. We are free to resist sin, free to die again and again to sin, free to hope for the future glory of what is to come and free to be human. By the way, "Human is what Adam was before the fall; it is what God created us to be. What we are now are sinners, justified by Christ and continuously being sanctified through the indwelling work of the Holy Spirit." (D. McWilliams)

2005-12-11T08:29:00.000-05:00

This past week has flown by. My sisters are home for Christmas and I suppose I should be glad they are, but, well, I'm ready for them to back to school. I know, I'm a terrible older sister.
On Thursday the weather here was funky. Usually storms don't sit over Florida, there are too many ocean/gulf/sea breezes for them to be stagnant. But, on Thursday we had all these low lying clouds just hangin' there. If I had been anywhere north of here I would have thought it was going to snow. But, since it was 88 outside and HUMID, I don't think any snow stood a chance.
Yesterday, being the wonderful granddaughter that I am, I went over and helped my Grandmother with some computer stuff. She was trying to do something with pictures of some quilts she had made. Playing around with all those pictures made me want to run home and look at all the pictures on my computer and I was going to post a few pictures on here, but my computer is being lazy, or stupid, or something and I can't get it to work!
So, to all of you enjoying colder climes, I'm jealous. And if you would like to experience getting a suntan in December, come see me.

2005-11-30T08:56:00.000-05:00

Okay, for any of you who happened to read this post in the 24+ hours that it was up...I'm not sure what happened the (argh) picture didn't post right! Oh well.
I was looking at pictures that I have stored on my laptop (which has no internet access) and thinking about all the fun I had with friends who came to visit me in Germany and all the great pictures I have from those times. It made me want to move back to Europe. Wait, everything makes me want to move back to Europe...I'm hopeless. And I'm moving back to Europe dang it!

It's Been a While

2005-11-30T08:51:00.000-05:00

So, Thanksgiving has past. Last week I was in Chattanooga. It's kind of hard to believe. One of my sister's is home from college until January, so far we have gotten along okay. Hopefully we get to spend some quality time together, who knows. Today is my day off, so I'm going Christmas shopping. You know, this is one of those times of the year when I am reminded that someone with a slightly smaller number of siblings is not spending nearly as much money for Christmas as I am...or they are giving better quality gifts! Not that I give cheap gifts, but I do try to avoid zeroing out my bank account!
Off to the stores!

Road Trip

2005-11-13T12:50:00.000-05:00

To Chattanooga I go! Woo hoo! I miss my dear old friends from there...so I'm going to go visit! Next Friday, I'm off. And thanks to a really, really nice co-worker, I got the time off work!

I caved!

2005-10-27T22:29:00.000-04:00

Yep, I did. I, who have said nae and even bleck to the idea, applied for a teaching certificate. Why? Well, I'll tell you. I am tired of getting rejected by publishing companies who don't know a good thing when it mocks them. I am tired of counting pills and capsules for a living, a job a trained monkey could do. And, I am tired of people automatically assuming I'm a teacher when I tell them I majored in English in college.
Oh, and the real reason: Virtual Schooling. Florida has a program designed for students who are home schooled or attend really small schools. It offers online courses to that they can learn the trig their mommy isn't really capable of teaching or take AP classes that their school/mom doesn't offer. Virtual schools have "teachers" who help the students via email and phone calls. So they "teach" students from all over the state, without actually having to be in a class room or do much lesson planning.
Plus, maybe if I actually have a teaching certificate I could go back to Germany someday...or maybe even Prague! Ooh, I like that idea...me, living in Praha...who want's to come visit?

It's GREat!

2005-10-05T16:49:00.000-04:00

Oh, who am I kidding. I took a "diagnostic test" for the GRE because I am thinking about grad school for next fall. Let's just put it this way, if the test could have laughed at me it would have. I have several problems with tests like this, the biggest one is Math, I stink at Math, that's why I majored in English. Another problem is that I haven't taken a test like this since my Junior year of high school so I'm a bit rusty. But, my biggest problem is this: I don't do well with timers. Ever since elementry school and math speed drills I freeze up whenever any one says, "You have __ minutes, begin." It's like my mind shuts down and decides, "I can't work under all this pressure, I quit." The sad thing is that I am a wealth of information, but it's all useless and it all flies right out of my head the minute the clock starts.
So I'm off to hit the books, I have a GRE study guide and I'm about to go crack it (and take a lot more practice tests before I take the real one)!

2005-09-23T21:53:00.000-04:00

I feel like my life has hit a rut (can I get an Amen!). I thought I had some good ideas for my future but they are all turning out to be dead ends. I'm open for suggestions if anyone wants to contribute. My plans for the weekend: work! Yep, no rest for the wicked. So, what are your plans?

Oh, man!

2005-09-12T23:03:00.000-04:00

Okay, when I was little (maybe 5-8) whenever my mom wanted me to sign a card, like for birthdays or something, I would always misspell my name. My mom thought there was something seriously wrong with me. But when you live in the south and your name is Megan it is pronounced "Maaay-gen" so whenever someone said to sound it out, I did, and then spelled my name wrong - Magen - yes, I know, it's sad.
Oh, but wait, it gets even sadder (with the grammar wrong in honor of my roommates from college). I just did it again. I just misspelled my own name. It's forgivable when you are five, but I'm twenty- (cough) and I should be able to spell by now, especially my own name. Somebody please tell me you have this problem. On second thought, maybe you shouldn't and I'll just face the ridicule alone!

The River

2005-09-04T15:47:00.000-04:00

Yep, that's where I am! The river. Now, if you aren't familiar with this it is a place of rest and relaxation, and lots of good home cooked food provided by my Grandma. She lives on the Weeki Wachee River, which in Seminole means...wait, I don't know. Yeah, so any time we get a chance my family comes up here. It's not as often as we used to, but we still come! My plan is to get some sun and maybe, if I can be persuaded, dip my feet into the freezing water for a few minutes. Anyway, it's just nice to be away from work.

Oh no you didn't!

2005-08-18T23:18:00.000-04:00

(yes, just like it sounds in your head.) I'm a little perturbed right now because someone verbally attacked one of my sisters in a very public way. You know how when you are growing up you can pick on your siblings but if any one else messes with them you want to knock a little sense into them. Well, that doesn't seem to change once you get older. The thing is that my family has proved over and over that you don't mess with us because there are too many of us for you to pick a fight with (we even like to bring in the cousins). My brother actually drove home from college one time because he was worried about our little sister.
Anyway, I just needed a place to vent, because as much as I would like to retaliate I know that the person who said the mean things was acting out of hurt and jealousy. And, my sister doesn't need people feeding her anger, she needs someone to listen and encourage. I realize this, I'm just still a little ticked. So, word to the wise, don't mess with my little sisters...we like to move in a clan!

Have you ever played Pooh Sticks?

2005-08-15T22:04:00.000-04:00

Well, have you? I have, on a bridge, over a creek, in Germany, with a cool friend named Martha! And if you don't know what Pooh sticks is, you are being deprived of an integral part of any normal childhood, complements of A.A. Milne.
I had a nice chat with my dear friend Lydsie today. It was wonderful.
And, for those of you mortified by the fact that I seem to have no apparent respect for my elders, I talked to my high school English teacher the other day, it was a good conversation, and I politely wave at her every day as I drop my sister off at school. Of course, this doesn't necessarily mean that I have figured out when to keep my mouth shut (you can ask Mrs. H about that) but at least I'm being nice.
Have you ever played the game Apples to Apples? Great game, lots of laughs! You should try it some time. Another fun game, with a morbid title, Killer Bunnies! Oh yeah!
Well, my sister is sending her death stare psycho vision into the back of my head, I think that means she wants me to get off...Ciao!

Random Thoughts...I warned you!

2005-08-05T23:18:00.000-04:00

Do you know that there is this cool book (okay, cool is relative) that teaches you how to draw a radish. Actually, it's a book on procrastination that was given to me, the queen of procrastination, by another wonderful procrastinator friend of mine. (Oh, she know's me so well.) Well, I just thought I'd mention it because I found the book when I was cleaning my room the other day and instead of cleaning I ended up reading the whole book...yes, procrastinating.
I work with this seventy year old man named Earl. He's a rather crochety old fellow and likes to snap at me when I goof around, which is often. But, he can't make me angry because every time he starts to snap at me I think about the Dixie Chicks' song, Earl, and I get a little tickled and start singing in my head and then it's okay!
I saw my old English teacher this morning. I tried to drive away before she saw me, but to no avail. She asked me if I was trying to get away without talking to her. I said "yes"! My mom was mad. Hey, at least I was honest.
A dear friend of mine called me at work the other day with some important news. Congratulations dear friend, you know who you are! Oh, and I'm praying. Oh, and send pictures. Oh, and did you get the package yet?
Wanna hear a joke...me too!
I have to work at eight am tomorrow morning. It's midnight and I just got home from a rather depressing bachelorette party, drunk light weights are no fun. But, I did get to see some old friends. Don't worry I'm not intoxicated, this is the way I think all the time.
Now, I'd like to apologize to subjecting you all to this. And, if you actually made it down this far in the post, my condolences, did I spell that right?

You should try it too!

2005-07-21T22:07:00.000-04:00

So, during my quiet time I'm reading this wonderful book, The Valley of Vision, edited by Arthur Bennett. It's a collection of puritan prayers and it is amazing. Yes, you do have to get past some thee's and thou's to get to the heart of what is being written; but I've found that a lot of the time whatever I'm reading is really putting into words some of the stuff I am struggling with and unable to express.
Anyway, I thought I'd share an exerpt from one of the prayers that hit me pretty hard. It's called Paradoxes:
My mind is a bucket without a bottom,
with no spiritual understanding,
no desire for the Lord's Day,
ever learning but never reaching the truth,
always at the gospel-well but never holding water...
My heart is without affection, and full of leaks.
My memory has no retention,
so I forget easily the lessons learned,
and thy truths seep away.
Give me a broken heart that yet carries home
the water of grace.

100 million points

2005-07-19T21:04:00.000-04:00

To Moira! Do whatever you like with them! I realized which movie it was as I walked away from the computer. I also started thinking about college when Jess would write movie quotes up on her white board and we would have to guess which movie it was from. So, in honor of those days and in tribute to the Hitchman sisters: "Hey Luce, do you need me to come over there...it looks like he's leaning."

Doors and Windows

2005-07-18T18:29:00.000-04:00

What's the movie that has the cheesy line, "When God closes a door, somewhere he opens a window?" 100 million points to the person who can tell me. Anyway, as I said before I applied to two jobs in NYC. Last night as I was trying to fall asleep I suddenly thought, "I don't want to move to NYC, bad things happen to people there; there is no such thing as suburbia, I'll be the hick from the sticks." Of course, I realized then that it was just fear overtaking me and I did a lot of praying that God would prepare me for what he had for me. Apparently (after a reply back from one company) it isn't working outside NYC, the other company is right in the heart of the city. So, yes, I'm still afraid, and I really would like something to work out for me, but I am trusting that God will point me in the right direction, you know, either walk through the door, or jump through the window. Speaking of, does anyone else ever feel like God is telling them to take the window and when they get to it they realize its on the 10th floor? Well, I'm outta here, my mom's making dinner and I'm starving!

Anyone want to live in New York?

2005-07-17T16:55:00.000-04:00

Maybe I'm crazy, maybe I'm off my rocker, or maybe I'm just desperate to not spend the rest of my life working in Mulberry, Fl. - I think it's the latter. Anyway, crazy or not I just applied for two jobs in the publishing industry. You know, books! Anyway, both jobs sound right up my alley and both jobs are for major, and by major I mean MAJOR, American publishing houses. The only catch...both jobs are in New York, one actually in NYC. Now the timid little southerner in me is coming out. Moving to New York seems much more scarry than living in a country where I don't speak the language. I mean, New York is filled with, well, New Yorkers, and most of my experiences with people from there haven't been entirely pleasant. But, I still want the job, I really want the job, so we'll see what happens.

They're Baaaack!

2005-07-16T17:49:00.000-04:00

My family left last Saturday for what was suppose to be the best family vacation of the summer - white water rafting, the mountains and the beach. While they were gone my job was to stay here and work and make money. Which I did, yea!
The fam arrived home this afternoon. They went to the mountains, but they didn't get to go white water rafting because the river was too dangerous. And, they went to the beach, but it was plagued with this lovely phenomena called red tide, so that was unpleasant, as well as the fact that the roof started leaking over my sister's bed on Wednesday night. It's a bummer for them, but instead of being on this big downer because they are no longer on vacation they are actually excited to be home, which is good for me because I don't feel too left out.
If you didn't know it there are six kids in my family, I'm number two and the one boy of the fam is 18 months younger than me. My brother and my older sister live in different parts of Florida and aren't at home ever. But the rest of us (the fab four) are actually having a pretty good summer relationship-wise. It's so nice that my sisters are growing up or grown because we can actually do stuff together like normal adult siblings (okay, well, not normal, but normal for us). And, instead of being annoyed that they're home I'm actually looking forward to spending time with the sisters - which they have officially dubbed Super Sister Time! Tonight, we go shopping! Should be interesting!

Bleh!

2005-07-04T14:10:00.000-04:00

So, I worked my tail off this weekend. My dad had a Boutwell family work day all planned for us on Saturday...the meany. The Hitchman's have to call in the troops for a work day at their place, my dad just has to wait for all of us to be home at the same time...lucky him! Anyway, my sister Callie and I shoveled mulch for about five hours on Saturday. Speaking of, did you know that there are about 30,000 spots in your lower back that will ache if you've shoveled mulch for five hours. Also, mulch, when it has been rained on and then sits out in the sun, radiates heat better than Nebuchadnezzer's fiery furnace. And, when you have to go to church the next morning and sit on uncomfortable pews you are reminded every second that you have muscles in your back, and legs, and (dare I say) butt!
You would think that after a grueling day of work we would veg for the rest of the weekend. Call us crazy, call us stupid, call us gluttons for punishment, Callie and I played tennis today, at 11 am, in the Florida heat. Stop shaking your head, it was a good idea at the time, plus Callie has some wierd disease so we can only play before she eats and she was starting to get hungry.
Now, those who have ever played tennis with me know that I stink, truly, it's pitiful to watch, but I held my own pretty well, we played 14 games and I won 4...that's good for me. And, we've decided to play some every week, but in the evening after work, not in the middle of the day, we did learn one lesson this weekend...we shouldn't have too many great ideas, they're dangerous!

More Pictures, what else!

2005-07-01T22:47:00.000-04:00

So, by request, kind of, a few more wedding #2 pictures!

So, Charissa's Dress didn't have a bustle originally, but, um, Patty made some adjustments!
The Tivoli is a Chattanooga must, it use to have $5 entrance fees for students, oh yeah!
Erin and Charissa in Clumpies, talking on the phone to Bob...who should have been in Chattanooga that weekend but copped out! Just kidding Bob!

Yeah for Pictures!

2005-06-29T19:38:00.000-04:00

This is Erin and myself at Charissa's rehersal...we're bored, can you tell?
Becky and Lydia, two former roommates, got ahold of my camera, actually I gave it to Lyd, what a mistake.
Can you say beautiful...this is the other Megan, wedding number one...for wedding number two check out Lydia's blog.
Ashley DeBardeshlehe! yep, leading a kidnapped bride out on the town for her last single night.
Loft: Jess, Lyd, Lael, Patty, Megan, Heather W., Nicole, Me

Heather N., Rochelle, Joy, Emily...and we accidentally forgot Erin (oops).

2005-06-29T19:23:00.000-04:00

So, this is Patty and Lydia on the top and Patty, Jess, Nicole and Heather N. on the bottom, some of the fabulous girls that I lived with in college.

My Mom's a stinker

2005-06-28T13:45:00.000-04:00

So, I walk into the house on Sunday afternoon, after an 8 1/2 hour car ride and my mom and dad are sitting there. After the normal hellos and hugs my mom says..."So, we're hosting a wedding shower on Thursday night, I volunteered you to be a host."
What the wedding overload. Apparently it isn't enough that I had to go to two weddings in one week, I also get to host a wedding shower. I think someone, somewhere just likes rubbing it in my face that I am S-I-N-G-L-E! Yes, I know, please don't remind me anymore...unless of course it's to say, "So, Meg, I know you are unattached and there is this really good looking guy who is just dying to marry you." Got it!

The DMV

2005-06-28T13:29:00.000-04:00

So, I can now legally drive in the states...well, I could before, but there would have been a whole lot of questions had I been pulled over. I went and got my Florida driver's license today. The DMV in good ole Lakeland is crazy. I didn't have to wait as long as I expected, but well, I encountered some interesting people.
First, I think I was cursed with some family trait that makes people want to talk to you. My dad and his sisters have it too, and although they like it, I don't really care for this quality. So, I got to talk to some interesting people.
Then, there was the woman with the spanish accent, who had to be around 75 years old. Whenever the woman behind the counter asked her a question, she would say, "Hea, speak up, I can't hear you." And then when asked to read a line of letters in the little vision thingy she couldn't do it. BUT, they issued her a driver's license anyway. Doesn't it make you feel safe to think you are driving on the roads with her behind the wheel.
Also, there as a guy who was blind in one eye, had multiple DUIs and had been arrested at some point for something. When he had to have his vision checked he couldn't see half the numbers and kept on messing up. Finally, the clerk said, "good enough," and issued him a driver's license as well.
So, now that those two have their driver's licenses and are out on the road I think I'm going to become a recluse and never come out of my house...it's too dangerous.

Way Down Upon the Swanee River!

2005-06-26T17:40:00.000-04:00

So, I'm back in Florida. I had a wonderful time in Wisconsin and Chattanooga and I finally made it to home sweet home about an hour ago. Now, to figure out what to do with the rest of my life. I'm not sure what that will be yet, but I have a few leads. We'll see.
I want to post pictures from the weddings I went to. Both brides were beautiful and I think I have a bunch of good pictures of my other friends as well...at least I hope I do.
Anyway, yeah, it's good to be home, for the time being. We'll see what happens next.

Leaving

2005-06-15T12:49:00.000-04:00

You know, in most countries, bidding someone farewell sounds pleasant, it's somewhat lyrical - you know, Bon Voyage, Sianora, Hasta Luego, G'day. Not so in the land of Deutsch, for the deutsch speakers their farewell reminds me of something entirely different. Since I'm leaving the Black Forest and Germany tomorrow I've been thinking about this phrase (I've also had it uttered in my direction a few times in the last few days). Ah yes, when I hear the phrase "Gute Fahrt" I can't help but...wonder what the heck? While other phrases make you think of the journey to come the Germans remind you to use the restroom before leaving. Actually, for you non-deutsch sprechers out there, Gute Fahrt means good journey. But, to my American ears that's not what it sounds like. So, now that I have completely bashed the phrase and have all of you wondering why this was even posted I'll bid Adieu (see, another good word) to fair Deutschland and the green hills of Marzell and move on to...Ohio? Ugg, not looking forward to that. But eventually Florida will come!
Tschuss from Germany, Auf Wiedersehen! (Yes Mr. Stemple, shoes, our feet are the same!)

I wasn't born yesterday...or maybe, I was?

2005-06-15T12:41:00.000-04:00

You know, P.T. Barnum once said "There's a sucker born every minute." I'm inclined to agree with him. I just spent the last short while "surfing" the internet looking for random things...mostly a job. It's interesting what you will find out there. One job ad said that if you agreed to pay their $20 membership fee you were sure to get an easy job that pays up to $50 an hour. Basically, they are advertising membership to a job search engine for $20. My question is, did someone actually pay for that, and if so did they think it through all the way before they forked over the dough? Come on, if you sign up there is a chance, a small chance that the companies they are promoting will have a job, and it says up to $50 which means $5. And, I don't think the job they are advertising is as simple and layed back as they make it out to be.
My fellow Americans, and Canadians, and other people groups of the world, I truly hope you are not suckered by some "get rich quick" scam. And if you are, let me tell you about the ocean front property I own in Montana...

2005-06-14T04:21:00.000-04:00

this is me at a soccer game, the bathrobe isn't mine, it was just keeping me warm.

Saturday...sheesh!

2005-06-13T04:49:00.000-04:00

So, I posted the verses from Psalm 103 because I needed the reminder that God is in control of his kingdom. Here's what happened to me on Saturday, it's a long story so sit back, relax, and laugh your hind quarters off.
Let me preface this with a few details. Since the kids all left this weekend and many of them I will never see again, we partook of a typical BFA tradition: the last night all-nighter. So, by Saturday morning at 8 am when I left for the airport with six kids, I had only received about 2 hours of sleep in the past 24 hours. I drove the kids to the airport without mishap and then stuck around just to make sure they checked in okay and got through security. For five of my six kids the check in process was quick and painless, but for poor Michael it took forever. Michael was flying to Burkina Faso and was only allowed to take a total of 20 kilos with him in checked luggage. His suitcase was 33 kilos, 13 kilos too many. So, he started rearranging things to send a bag back to his dorm with me. He removed his Bible, his yearbook and two packages of notebook paper and then went back to weigh his bag...16 kilos. The word of God is heavy! So, he put some stuff back in and went to check it through...20.1 kilos, 100 grams over. Sorry, says the woman, it's still over weight. By this point poor Michael was a bit frustrated, so he opened his bag and handed me the first thing he saw...his shorts, I'll wear my dad's, he said. So, we think Michael is ready...not so fast, now she wants to weigh his carry on. More rearranging ensues in which we end up giving some of his stuff to two of the kids who are on the same flight as he is, who then give it back to him once they have passed through security.
We, one of my student's Rachel came along for the ride and to keep me awake, anyway, we finally say goodbye and get in the van to head back to school. As I'm driving along the autobahn I go to shift from 3rd to 4th and my hand slips and I shift into reverse instead. Sounds like a meat grinder...so stupid. Anyway, I continue driving on but I have to make a stop at a store in France before I can go home, someone asked me to look for Lime Fanta to bring to them back in the states. So, I go to the store, unsuccessfully look for the Fanta and then go out to my van to leave. Only one problem, it won't go into reverse. Rachel, the student with me get's out and tries to push, but that doesn't work. So, I have to call my dorm. It is then that I realize the cell phone that I was supposed to take with me is sitting on the counter in my dorm, right where I left it. In utter frustration I go to find a pay phone and in the process of getting out of the van I lock the keys in the car. The pay phone I find doesn't accept the number I'm trying to call and so I have to go find another pay phone. So, Rachel and I walk 2 km to another phone and then it hits me, I should have just tried a different number. Sheesh, I'm a dufus. So, we make the call to my Dorm dad, and start walking back to the store. After about an hour of waiting he shows up and we then try to jimmy the lock open. But we needed a coat hanger, so I go into the store to buy a metal coat hanger but all I end up coming up with is the metal handle to a plastic paint bucket. We rip the handle off and try to use it, but it doesn't have a big enough hook to grab the lock bar. Steve, my dorm dad, turns around to use the metal post of the cart return to bend the handle a little longer and lo and behold in the trash bin of the cart return are three metal hangers. Finally we get the car open, Steve and Rachel push it out, and I drive it to the school. We have appropriately named this the Airport run from Hell, it took 66 km round trip.
The reason for the verse is that it reminds me of something Rachel said while we were waiting to be rescued. You know Megan, God is teaching us something, we don't know what it is, and honestly, right now I don't like it very much, but it could be worse, and at least we know he loves us.
Amen Rachel, thanks for going on my adventure with me!

Truth

2005-06-12T03:24:00.000-04:00

Praise the Lord, O my soul;
all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
Praise the Lord, O my soul,
and forget not all his benefits -
who forgives all your sins
and heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit
and crowns you with love and compassion,
who satisfies your desires with good things
so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.
...
The Lord has established his throne in heaven,
and his kingdom rules over all.
Praise the Lord, you his angels,
you mighty ones who do his bidding,
who obey his word.
Praise the Lord, all his heavenly hosts,
you his servants who do his will.
Praise the Lord all his works
everywhere in his dominion.
Praise the Lord, O my soul.
~Psalm 103:1-5, 19-22

A Past Remembered

2005-06-10T16:58:00.000-04:00

Today was graduation for our seniors here at BFA. It's kind of a bittersweet time as all graduations are. However, there is one huge difference here. For BFA seniors this isn't their hometown, for most of them their parents don't live here, or anywhere near here. So, unlike those of us who graduated in the states and still return home on occassion for holidays and summers and the like these kids don't. While our parents root us to the town they are in, these students have no such thing. Going home to visit family does not mean coming back here, and so, there isn't the chance that there will be a random group of their high school buddies all visiting family for Christmas and a spontaneous dinner out will occur.
This makes me sad. Not that I stay in touch terribly well with friends from high school, but at least I have the option of seeing them when I'm home. For these students they may see each other again, but it will take far more planning than any American high school alumni has ever put into seeing a group of friends. And, the chances are that it won't work out. Am I being a little melancholy and depressing? Well, I guess I am. I just feel bad for these kids. Graduation is an emotional enough time, but add to it the idea that you may never see your friends again and it becomes even more emotional.
I guess I also know how these kids are feeling. In a week I fly to the states, leaving BFA for good. This will no longer be home for me. While I am looking forward to the next phase God has for me, I guess I'm realizing a few truths as well.
1. I am forever changed - this place, these people, this ministry, has had a greater affect on my life than anything else ever has, even four years of college.
2. I may never be back, ever!
3. There are people here who made a huge impact in my life that I will probably never see again this side of eternity. The worst part of this is that I will never be able to express to them in words what they mean to me and how much they have taught me.
So, I feel bad for these kids...maybe its a vent for the self-pity that I am starting to feel. I don't know.
I do know that this is an incredibly long post...so I'm gonna quit.
One week I'll be stateside. Looking forward to seeing friends, dreading missing friends. What a predicament.
Tschuss!

2005-06-01T08:41:00.000-04:00

Yeah - this is Jo (in blue) - Jo plays right defense - Jo stripped the ball from #10 - we like Jo because we don't like #10 and because Jo is just one cool and tough young lady!

2005-06-01T08:13:00.000-04:00

The water ride wasn't wet enough so we had a splashing fight during the lulls. It was so hot and dry on Sunday that our clothes dried out faster than we did.

2005-06-01T08:12:00.000-04:00

Josh, B' and Lizzie on Lizzie's first roller coaster ever. You can't tell but she's praying "Dear Jesus, Dear Jesus" over and over!

Europa Park

2005-05-30T08:49:00.000-04:00

So, we went to Europa Park as a dorm yesterday. It was a good time even with all the obvious Disney World rip-offs. I would have to agree with B'linda that the best part of the day was when we were waiting in line in a dim tunnel and Kaitlyn commented on the darkness. Response from B': "Uh, Kaitlyn, take the shades off sweetheart." Yeah!
Pictures to come later, its too bad we can't do video clips because I have a really funny one of someone's first ever roller coaster ride.

2005-05-27T04:49:00.000-04:00

So, Jenny and I dumped a bucket of water on B'linda's head, yeah, and then she egged us. I hear egg is good for your hair...I'm hoping that's true!

2005-05-27T04:46:00.000-04:00

Okay, so it's Gena not Gene...oops, sorry, and this is at about 1 am on the bus ride on the way home from tournament.

2005-05-27T04:44:00.000-04:00

Das ist meine...uh, meine...cousin...I forgot the german word. Anyway, this Meredith, she's pretty cool!

2005-05-27T04:43:00.000-04:00

Uhh..Gene Bulgrein and Me, I promise, she's the coach!

Reflections

2005-05-27T04:41:00.000-04:00

Anna reminded me yesterday that there are only three weeks until I leave for the states. I realize that just a few short days ago I was ready to be there. Now, I'm still ready, but I wish I could stay here too. You know, that whole Walk to Remember "two places at once" thing...minus the cheesy straddling a state line. Yeah, so three weeks, which means that two weeks is grad and then it is pretty much over minus a whole lot of cleaning and packing.
Yesterday we had our senior blessing time where we honor the seniors. It was a good time of reflection and remembering, and honoring people. But it reminded me of a few ridiculously funny (of course you had to be there) moments. Such as: Jenny getting a splinter in her bum, Kaitlyn, Erica and I hiding in the attic for 20 minutes at least during a game of sardines, Martha and Steph stealing my books...all the time, random Lizzie logic - which really isn't logic at all, Julie and Claire singing on Monday mornings in the shower, dinner announcements. Sheesh there are so many good times. I'm gonna miss these girls.

I want to be in America, okay for me in America...

2005-05-24T09:25:00.000-04:00

everything's free in America, for a small fee in America! (Sung in best Hispanic accent, of course!)
In just over three weeks I will be flying with everything I own to the U.S. I think I'm ready. After being on military bases all weekend for soccer tournaments I am starting to get the American bug.
Don't get me wrong, I love Europe. In fact, I want to live here for the rest of my life. But, on occasion, I do feel the urge to be able to hop in my car and go to a movie that doesn't cost $10 and then maybe go to Walmart or Target at 10:00p.m. just because I can because they are still open.
So, things I'm looking forward to: watching the news in English, good Mexican food, showers that are bigger than a phone booth,
Things I'll miss: standard transmissions, 12-2 siesta time, quiet, little German ladies with purple hair, ICE CAFEs, Pedestrian only areas, hiking trails that end at castles.

Four Weddings and...

2005-05-04T09:26:00.000-04:00

a whole lot of traveling (you thought I was going to say "a funeral" didn't you). So this is how my summer is shaping up. Now, instead of three weddings to attend between June 1 and Nov. 1 I have four. It's not that I mind so much. In fact, I am excited to see my friends get married. It will be wonderful. (Here comes the "but"!) BUT, it does make it rather hard to be content to be single. What? You're getting a husband? No fair, I want one too. Where's the line for those?

Honestly, I can live without a guy. How do I know...24 years old, no guy, still living. Yep, that's how I know. And, in truth, I only have rare moments when I think about being married and all that stuff. I'm too busy living, which seems like a rather good thing to be busy doing. BUT, yep, there's that butt, I mean but, again...but, I still think about it sometimes.

Gotta go write a ransom note, I stole a teddy bear...Jesse Hawkins keep your mouth shut.

Tschuss

Weekends!

2005-04-29T06:30:00.000-04:00

So, as a dorm staffer I generally do not look forward to weekends because it means more work with the girls home for the entire day. But, this weekend should be good. The weather is nice and there are soccer games tomorrow so I should be set for my fill of sunshine, at least I'm hoping that's the case.
I've had a lot on my mind over the past week and I've finally come to some solid conclusions. The biggest one being that I am going to pursue going to Poland full time. I just feel like that is where the Lord is directing me and until he closes a door I am going to actively pursue it. Of course, the idea of fundraising again isn't something I look forward to, but what will be will be.
I'm off to the physical therapist. Tschuss!

To Infinity and Beyond...or maybe just Poland!

2005-04-26T07:38:00.000-04:00

So, yeah, I went to Poland again. Really the main point of this post is to rub it in Jesse's face as much as possible that I went to Poland, that's right I said Poland. Actually, I wish Jesse could have gone with me. She would have liked to but, well, she has priorities...like homework and passing the tenth grade.
Poland was wonderful. I have decided to describe it as quality time, in a quality place with quality people. The best part of all: I feel like I was ministered to, and was able to minister to others all at the same time. By far this was my most peaceful weekend off ever.
One more thing: I started thinking about what it means to yield our lives to Christ. I think I often limit yielding to the traffic sign definition, I give Christ the right of way in my life. But, I'm learning that there is more to it than that. Not only does Christ have the right of way, but he also receives the "produce of my crop" or what the field yields. Meaning that it isn't just that I give Christ my life, yielding to him, but I also give Christ all that I do with my life, everything that it involves. Hmm. Not too deep, I realize, but something I need to ponder anyway.
So, off to more adventures. This time:Kandern Soccer Field. My mission: Get the JV team to do a good corner kick. We'll see how it goes!

Lazy Afternoons and Other Nonsense

2005-04-16T11:24:00.000-04:00

So, yesterday, no girls. They had to stay at school until 8:30 for Staff/Student dinners. I wisely used my time by watching a pirated copy of Phantom of the Opera with Russian subtitles. Isn't it amazing what you can buy in former communist, non-European Union countries. Anyway, it was my first time seeing the movie, but not the musical itself. My thoughts: the live version is better but the girl who played Christine Daae was phenomenal for being only 18. Yeah, so that was my lazy afternoon.
The other nonsense...I get to go on two trips this next week, one to the Bodensee (or Lake Constance, take your pick) the other to...well, I'll tell you later. But, I'm more excited about the other one than I am about the Bodensee one.
More nonsense...today I threw a plastic bunny, with a parachute attached, out our third floor window. Excitement insued, followed by said bunny flying out the window about five more times. Poor bunny.
Oh, and on Wednesday I rolled in the grass for the first time this spring, got my shirt rather dirty but it was fun. Before I could get up a few of my soccer girls sat on me, by the way, you all are heavy...and you know who you are!
Even more nonsense...we're having hamburgers for dinner tonight, which is good because I haven't had a good hamburger since, well, since I was last in the states. You have no idea what you'll take for granted until you can no longer take it for granted.
Gotta go, I'm suppose to be working!

Walking

2005-04-14T07:29:00.000-04:00

I went on a long walk yesterday, I needed to clear my head and so I decided to take a path that I last took about a year ago, with two friends from the west coast.
The walk was exactly what I needed. I was feeling overwhelmed and a little drained and the time to think and pray was wonderful. I found myself comparing my spiritual walk with my physical one. I was barely a kilometer into my walk when my legs started burning and I wanted to turn back. And, with every bend in the road I kept hoping that my destination would come into view. Plus, there were obstacles to face as I walked, like hills and German Shepherds, and different things to encounter along the way.
I can't help but think about my spiritual walk in the same way. Usually, it is right at the outset of some major "thing" in my life that I want to turn back and pretend it never happened. And, like on my walk yesterday, the only thing that keeps me going sometimes is hope. Hope that around the next bend my destination will be in sight, hope that along the way I will see something familiar, some sort of mile marker. And yes, my spiritual walk faces obstacles, like pride (which is a huge hill) and doubt. But, like my walk there are good encounters too. Fresh springs and open fields greeted me as I journeyed yesterday, and often I am filled by springs of truth when I feel down in my spiritual walk.
I forgot. Yesterday I walked alone, but a year ago I had two friends with me, friends who not only walked with me physically but also accompany me and challenge me spiritually as well. (Thanks Lyd and Christine.)
Oh, and my final destination: well, yesterday it was a castle...for the rest of my life it will be mansions in glory! What an awesome parallel.

Excuse Me, You're Standing on my Last Nerve.

2005-04-12T02:53:00.000-04:00

You know how there are certain people in your life who, no matter what they do, are constantly getting on your nerves. No matter how much you try to be nice, or to let them know (subtley, of course) that they are bothering you, they just don't get the hint. And, just when you think that your brain will implode from the effort of being civil, it does.
One such person exists in the community I live in. She thinks we are great friends, and I am trying to be civil, but my head hurts every time I try.
All I have to say is...ARG!

Tired? Me too!

2005-04-07T06:48:00.000-04:00

I don't mind so much the being busy aspect of dorm life. In fact, I usually enjoy having plenty of stuff to do. It's the being tired all the time part that I don't care for so much. I can't remember the last time I felt rested. I mean all out, no pressure, absolutely well rested. I am sure it was sometime before my high school career started. Even on my breaks here I feel tired.
And with all that's going on right now, I feel more than tired. I'm ridiculously, unequivocally exhausted. Yes, I realize that I brought said exhaustion upon myself, but I don't have to like it.
And yet, despite all the tiredness and exhaustion, I am really quite content, even happy.
Hmm, wonder why that could be?

What happened to Joy?

2005-04-03T11:04:00.000-04:00

No, I don't mean Joy, like the cute little blonde that lived on my hall in college. I mean the second Fruit of the Spirit,you know: love, JOY, peace...! (Gal. 5:22-23 if you were wondering.)I've had a lot of free time lately and I've been using most of it to read up on what is happening to some of my family, and a few old acquaintances from high school and college. One of the things that has struck me most is a general lack of joy. I don't mean happiness, I mean all out J-O-Y. (Whoever just called me Pollyanna can leave!)
Here's what I see. I see some of my friends and family who don't realize that the privileges and conveniences that life has afforded them are just that, privileges. So, when things aren't going the way they expect them to they get sucked into a hole of melancholy and cynicism. These are people who claim to be Christians and yet can't remember that God never promises for our lives to be perfect, or even easy. He only promises to make us perfect. And joy, it doesn't come from circumstances. It is our hearts response to what Christ has done for us.
I realize that I sound like I'm on a soapbox, but maybe it's because I just spent a week with people who's faith was more real than mine will ever be. And, they are filled with the joy of the Lord, it's running over in them. Instead of focusing on what they haven't got, or what is wrong with the world they are focused on Jesus Christ and they are making the world more right by living as He would have them live. It was rather shaming in a way. I realized that I come from a society of wealth and privilege, as do most of us, and I'm not satisfied, while others have everything they need because they are content in Christ, not their circumstances.
Okay, I guess I'm finished. I know that there are still going to be cynical people, and melancholy people. And just by talking (or typing) at someone I can't change much, it has to be Christ. But, well, it felt good to get that out. At least I learned something over the past week, even if no one else will.

2005-04-02T05:28:00.000-05:00

Here you go Lyd, my personal favorite pic of Prague

Cuz she told me to!

2005-04-02T05:26:00.000-05:00

So I posted a picture of Prague! Why? Because Lyd told me to. YES, I always do what I'm told. (Hey, I heard that snort, who let my mom on this site?) It's quite boring around here. Quiet, which is nice, but boring. The kiddos don't arrive back until Monday and I miss them, but don't tell them I said that. The best thing about this weekend is the sunshine. And the fact that I have a huge back deck on which to sunbathe. Oh, and I plan on taking advantage of it, just as soon as the sun peeks over the house and starts warming it up back there. So, even though I'm bored, here's to my last weekend of freedom!

2005-04-01T09:30:00.000-05:00

Oh, and here's a pic of Scotland, taken by my good friend Heather! Who should be a photographer, but feels called to bake for highschool girls...just like me!

2005-04-01T09:20:00.000-05:00

Krakow, Poland...beautiful city!

My middle name is wierd!

2005-04-01T08:38:00.000-05:00

So, for my entire life my middle name has been...well, the bane of my existance. But, it has made me unique. So, as I'm setting up my blog site I decide that using my middle name will make my sight all the more unique and I'll be able to remember what it is. But NO, apparently there is someone else out there who's named Megan Clark...how weird is that. So, if the other Megan Clark ever ends up on my site, my condolensces to you for having the same middle name...unless of course, it's your last name, in which case you're the lucky one.